• Melissa Neeb

What are You Denying?

It's time to be brave.





I get it. I really do. Denial is a survival mechanism. Self-preservation. Protection. I lived in denial for years. YEARS.


There was a lot I denied. I denied my husband had a problem with alcohol and drugs. I denied our marriage was in trouble. I denied I had any part in either his addiction or our marriage problems. I denied my pain. I denied the truth. I denied how much it affected our kids. I denied that I was emotionally shut down. I denied that I was angry and bitter. I denied how desperately I clung to the illusion of control. I denied that anxiety ruled me.


I denied all these things to others. But what I failed to realize was that I couldn't lie to others without first lying to myself.


Breaking out of denial and facing reality was BRUTAL. It was devastating. It was the. hardest. thing. I've. ever. had. to. do.


But while denying what was going on seemed safe and felt comfortable, it was keeping me STUCK. It was preventing growth. Preventing healing. Preventing me from becoming who God intended me to be. He didn't intend for me to be stuck, powerless, hopeless, depressed, isolated, and broken. He never intended that! And listen to me, He doesn't want that for you either.


So it's time to take off the mask. The mask that says "I'm ok." The one that says, "I have this all under control." The one that says, "My marriage is fine. I can stop my bad habit whenever I want. I'm not responsible for my own pain. I don't have what it takes to fulfill my dream. I'm not worth it. I can't help it. This is just who I am. I can't change. Nothing will ever change..."


Stop it! Stop denying.


Before anything can change, you have to face the thing you are denying and look it dead in the eyes. You have to name it. You have to confront it. You have to be brave enough to let today be the day that you step out of self-protection mode and into warrior mode.


I can do ALL THINGS through CHRIST who STRENGTHENS me.

Philippians 4:13


If I could go back in time, I would tell the younger version of myself that even though facing reality will be incredibly difficult, almost unbearable at times, the truth is that the longer I ignore it, the worse it gets. The longer I shove it down, the bigger it grows. The more I deny, the more I feed the thing I'm trying to hide.


What is the thing you are denying? Trauma from your childhood? Sexual abuse? Anger issues? Resentment? Addiction to a substance? Food issues? Marriage trouble? Depression? Anxiety? Feelings of worthlessness? Parenting struggles?


Please give yourself the permission and freedom to speak the truth. Out loud. To yourself. To God. And to someone you trust.


Life was not meant to be survived. It was meant to be enjoyed. We were built for joy. If you are not experiencing joy in your life, you are missing out on all that God has for you.


Let the sea ROAR, and all that fills it; let the field EXULT, and everything in it! Then shall the trees of the forest sing for JOY before the Lord, for he comes to judge the earth. Oh GIVE THANKS to the Lord, for he is GOOD; for his STEADFAST LOVE endures forever!

1 Chronicles 16:32-34 (ESV)


Let today be the day that your journey of healing begins.


~Melissa


| If you are struggling and want some resources to begin your healing, do not be afraid to reach out. My door is always open. |

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